The Taliban are coming. Har dee har har

Like most denizens of Desiland, I too, am concerned about this all this Taliban hullabaloo. The ostrich inside me really hopes it's all an MQM propoganda, but by the looks of it, us people in Desiland need to wake up and smell the coffee! Its really so sad to see my beloved Desiland fall into such hands. Will we suffer the same fate as Afghanistan?

A lot of humourous views pertaining to the rise of the Taliban are being heard: the classic one being about how soon women will be wearing a shuttlecock burkas (out goes the capris Im guessing) and men high shalwars.

I came across this article today which discusses two mind boggling issues: the Taliban and time zones. lol.


Pakistan planning to have multiple time zones
By: Bangalore
Islamabad : Pakistan


Pakistan is planning to have multiple time zones to cater to this need raised by several sections of society there. An announcement to this effect was made by Interior minister Ghulam Sher Khan in Islamabad on Wednesday.

“Each time zone will be name after a terrorist who could be found in that an area on that longitude. For example, a time zone based on Longitude: 67° 02 will be called Dawood Standard Time, while the one based on 71 21' will be called Osama standard time,” Khan said. Pakistan has said that this will be its way of honoring the great terrorists who have placed the country firmly on the international map and has attracted global condemnation.

When reminded of Pakistan’s pledge in the so called war on terror, Khan claimed that this was his country’s way of giving clues to the US. “What can we do if they don’t come down and bomb these places back to stone age? I mean anyway half of our nation is already half of our country is in stone age, so what difference will that make,” he asked.

Taliban Premier League
Taliban, the rulers-in-waiting in Pakistan have announced that they will be holding a series of T-20 matches across the country to encourage camaraderie among their cadres. The matches will be held between teams drawn in from cities currently ruled by Taliban. The tentative list of teams is as follows:

* Peshwar Donkey Riders
* Bajaur Teen Whippers
* Malakand Lunatics
* Mardan Moth Eaters
* Quetta Stone Agers
* Multan Neanderthals
* Mingora Dark Agers

My pet peeves

So I've had major writers block for a little while now. I blame it ALL on those mind numbing judgments Ive had to read for my legal research. Wading through a good 150 odd pages of grammatical errors, hilarious ( or so I'd like to think) observations and classic quotes (more on that later) from our learned judges. It's enough to give anyone nightmares! So Ive been going home late, working at home till bedtime and that makes me VERY cranky and irritable. And impatient.

Which made me think I need to vent all that energy SOMEWHERE. So here is a list of my pet peeves (in no order of preference):

1. people who leave the door to my room open. I mean, you opened it when you came in, WHY oh WHY can you not shut it! I just cannot understand that.

2. People who use their mobiles' loud speaker. "DOH KILO BAINGAN, AIK PAO BHEENDI, AIK KILO PYAAZ AAJ LAY ANA" and "AAJ TUM NAY MUJHE CURRY KAY SAATH PAKORAY NAHIN DIYE" is what I've actually heard at work.

3. Lawyers shouting in the court to make a point. What is this, a bollywood movie?

4. Girls who wear jeans with a kamiz and dupatta. SOMEBODY CALL FASHION POLICE because that is the biggest fashion faux pas there can EVER be. Either you wear the full suit... or kurti (whichever length) with jeans. I ESPECIALLY cannot stand the jeans+kamiz+dupatta combo at work! Makes me want to slap the wax out of their ears I tell you!

5. Nosy people. "Why are your cheeks so red?" Me:Its the inner glow..DUH its blusher!

6. People who make it their business to know exactly what I'm doing on my computer screen. I had this nosy lady almost trip and fall on me because she leaned in so far. Serves her right that I was drafting an affidavit.

7. writers block. brain not registering anything. darn it.